The Phone Call Nobody Wants
I have been coordinating counseling in a public school setting for about 35 years. During that time I have seen many teenagers and families go through some horrific situations. I’ll never for get my first student who died in my class, Tricia a 6th grader. She was a bright and beautiful little girl. I remember parent conferences with her mom and dad, they were a neat family. Two weeks after the end of school I heard she had cancer and three weeks later she passed away. I can still see her face to this day, it was a difficult experience.
That episode was difficult; however, it paled in comparison to some others. Being the Crisis coordinator, I have been involved in 28 student’s funerals. In each of those I visit the parents. It is one of the more difficult things to do. While all the cases are deeply sad and touching some are significantly harder than others. I have talked with parents who have lost children. I have talked with children who have unexpectedly lost parents. These life situations can be hard to cope with.
The worst cases sometimes are those when the parents get that one phone call or knock at the door that no parent ever wants to experience. That is when the police officer knocks at your door and says, there has been an accident and your child did not make it. I have personally talked with several parents within hours of receiving such information. Generally, they are in shock. As a parent, I cannot imagine what that moment must be like. There are however different responses within that grief and shock.
Permit me to illustrate three different accidents. Incidentally, all three deaths were cause by intoxicated drivers. Billy’s car was hit from behind and burst into flames and he died. When I talked to his mother she was so anger she actually cursed God. I have never seen a person so vile towards God. She was so hostile and angry there wasn’t much to say. All I could say was, you are in a unique situation, and you are one of the few people who may be experiencing what God must have felt when he watched his only son die. It didn’t help too much, two days later she hysterically climbed upon the casket and tried to pry it open again cursing God. The hate towards God was obvious. It was a terrible situation.
Then there was Jim, he was a great football and baseball player. One night after a party, the car in which he was riding in, was being driven by a drunken friend, it hit a tree at 80 miles an hour. He was dead at the scene. His mother, I know well. She is a strong lady who speaks publicly on the accident to stress to kids and adults how quickly a poor decision can result in very bad and sometimes devastating circumstances.
The third one was John. He was killed by a drunk driver who was speeding down a narrow road just two days after getting out of jail for what; you guessed it, DUI charges. This situation was just as horrific as any. Yet there was a difference. The mother was a born again believer. She was admittedly upset, yet she had a peace. She actually wanted to speak at her son’s funeral. At the funeral there were over 800 people. She stated that her son was with the Lord and that he would be taken care of and she and her family would be taken care of by the Lord. Her faith and trust in Jesus Christ made a great difference. The entire funeral had a different atmosphere.
The point of this is simple, your own private world can change faster than you could ever imagine. Parents love you kids with your whole heart; Protect them. Kids love your parents; Respect them. Both parents and kids need to love the Lord, and Trust and Obey him.
Love the Lord with all your heart and he will take care of you both here on earth and there in heaven. Life can be difficult, but God is always Good and full of Grace. (Pro.3:5-7)
